Is Lane Kiffin's team going undefeated? Ranking LSU's opponents' chances of beating the Tigers
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Is Lane Kiffin's team going undefeated? Ranking LSU's opponents' chances of beating the Tigers originally appeared on The Sporting News.
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Lane Kiffin is the man College Football America loves to hate, and he’s apparently fine with it. As a result, college football fans are going to be rooting for at least two teams every Saturday – their favorite team and whoever is playing LSU.
Based on Saturday night’s 51-10 demolition of Clemson, chances are the second team people are rooting for isn’t going to win very often. But we are here to give hope, or at least to inform, when you may see Kiffin get his come-uppance in the regular season.
Here are the teams remaining on LSU’s schedule, ranked from least to most likely to wipe that swarmy grin off Kiffin’s face and derail the Lane Train. Optimistic takes only.
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LSU's remaining 2026 schedule
McNeese State – Oct. 3
I’m starting with the positives – McNeese just beat Texas Wesleyan 52-0. Bad news: Texas Wesleyan is an NAIA program, which I believe stands for Not Awesome In Athletics. LSU is 2-0 all-time against the Cowboys. Will Wade will be flipping a two-headed coin before kickoff.
Chances to make Lane sad: Roughly the same as Rachael Gunn winning breakdancing gold in Los Angeles next summer.
Louisiana Tech – Sep. 12
The Bulldogs once beat LSU 6-0 twice in the same week! Unfortunately, those games were in October, 1904, and according to the invaluable site Winispedia, one game was in Ruston, La., and the other site is listed as ‘unknown’. If this game were at ‘unknown’ rather than Baton Rogue, the Bulldogs would have a better chance.
Chances to make Lane sad: Less than Livvy Dunne having October plans to watch her beloved Pittsburgh Pirates.
Mississippi State – Oct. 17
Fact you can’t argue with – LSU has never beaten nine SEC teams in one regular season. Mississippi State will be one of nine this year. Also, the Bulldogs are bringing back the interlocking ‘MSU’ on the helmet, which was their primary logo from 1986-99, during which MSU beat LSU three times.
Chances to make Lane sad: Better if things go south for Dak Prescott in Dallas, and he can sue his way into a fifth year at Mississippi State by mid-October.
At Arkansas – Nov. 28
Thanksgiving weekend is the time of year ol’ Lane starts looking for his next job (New York Jets?). Couple that with some nasty Fayetteville weather and the pressure associated with lifting the Golden Boot trophy that weighs roughly 175 pounds and there could be trouble for the Tigers.
Chances to make Lane sad: Lower than the chances of finding a 4K television on Black Friday in any of the 125 Walmarts located in the state of Arkansas.
At Kentucky – Oct. 10
New coach Will Stein told everyone at SEC Media Days that Kentucky was going to win because of Will Stein. That is pretty much good enough for me. (And former Notre Dame quarterback Kenny Minchey is pretty good.)
Chances to make Lane sad: Better than hitting a Superfecta at nearby Churchill Downs.
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At Auburn – Oct. 24
Lane Kiffin almost went to Auburn in 2022 before choosing to stay at Ole Miss in another drama-filled coaching search. Is there a chance Lane looks at that untethered bald eagle flying around pre-game, has buyer’s remorse and starts to plan the breadcrumbs he’s going to drop should the Auburn job come open again?
Chances to make Lane sad: The Tigers haven’t won more than six games since 2019 and struggled to beat Baylor by one measly point to open the season. Magic Eight Ball says ‘ask again later.’
Imagn Images
At Tennessee – Nov. 21
Tennessee coach Josh Heupel told Knoxville sporting goods stores to stock up on golf balls and mustard bottles for Kiffin’s visit to Neyland Stadium. Hopefully Heupel is stocking up on elite offensive and defensive linemen, because that’s what it will take to beat these Tigers.
Chances to make Lane sad: The Vols will never make Lane as sad as he made them, but UT could stress him out for a good while in this one if freshman quarterback Faizon Brandon has his feet under him at this point in the season.
Texas A&M – Sep. 26
Remember, Texas A&M is directly responsible for getting Kiffin to Baton Rouge in the first place. The Aggies embarrassed the Tigers so badly in a 49-25 win, LSU decided it wanted to pay Brian Kelly $54 million to stop coaching and the Kiffin pursuit began. The Aggies have the same coach, the same QB and hopefully the same get-the-other-coach-fired game plan.
Chances to make Lane sad: We’re approaching 50 percent territory here. The Aggies lost a lot from their CFP team a year ago, and that team had a soft schedule that helped them get in. They will be an underdog here.
MORE: CFP projections after Week 1
Alabama – Nov. 7
Now we’re talking. Alabama has won six of the last seven games in Baton Rouge, with LSU’s only win coming by one point on a last-play-of-the-game two-point conversion. Nick Saban’s still coaching the Tide, right?
Chances to make Lane sad: Keelon Russell looked good in his debut as QB1. Coach Kalen DeBoer is 7-1 on the road against ranked teams the last four years. Chances here are, as Larry David might say, “prettay, prettay … prettay good.’
MORE: Ranking the quarterback debuts from Week 1
At Ole Miss – Sep. 19
Oxford needs to shut down all hot yoga studios the second LSU’s plane hits the ground. Kiffin is going to need his zen while 60,000 spurned Southerners voice their displeasure at being jilted. Oh, and Ole Miss is really, really good. How’s that for optimism?
Chances to make Lane sad: Win or lose, Lane won’t be sad, because he will be the center of attention the entire week leading up to the game, and if there is anything that makes Lane happy, it is being the center of attention. But the Rebs could be favored in this one.
Texas – Nov. 14
Texas looks like it has lots of professional football players, none of whom have signed an NFL contract as of yet. Arch Manning will be the best QB on the field, Cam Coleman will be the best WR on the field and Colin Simmons will be the best defensive player on the field. If the Tigers are still unbeaten by mid-November, Arch Madness will hit a new level nationally.
Chances to make Lane sad: Excellent! Texas is a true national title contender. The nation is certainly hoping LSU is not. This will be the biggest chance for a Lane Train derailment. Hook ‘em will become the national greeting for CFB fans in the know for a week.
So there you have it. Go forth, enjoy rooting for your favorite team and keep an eye on the SEC scoreboard on your phone. LSU will go down at some point, right?
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