Bianchi: LSU’s Brian Kelly buyout buffoonery is gifting Gators a clear path to Lane Kiffin
NCAAF College Football News, Photos, Stats, Scores, Schedule & Videos...
Running off at the typewriter …
Good news, Gator fans – the Lane Kiffin sweepstakes just got a lot easier.
Why? Because LSU – seemingly Florida’s main competition for college football’s hottest coaching candidate (unless an NFL team suddenly enters the picture) – just launched itself into a swamp of its own making.
While Florida is presumably lining up boosters and debating whether $150 million is too much to pay for Kiffin, LSU is too busy trying to cheat its last coach out of $54 million to focus on hiring its next one.
That’s right: The same LSU that bragged about landing Brian Kelly on a 10-year, $95 million “fully guaranteed” deal is now pretending that “guaranteed” means “unless we change our minds later.” Kelly just filed a lawsuit in which he claims LSU, after firing him, suddenly decided he wasn’t “formally terminated” – and, for good measure, declared they could be firing him “for cause” weeks after he packed up his office.
You can’t make this up. LSU basically fired Kelly, watched their athletic director resign under political pressure, and then said, “Wait, actually, you don’t get your money because we’ve decided we didn’t really mean it.”
That’s not how contracts work – that’s how toddlers negotiate bedtime.
And this is the program that thinks it’s about to outbid Florida for Lane Kiffin?
Puh-leeze!
You think Kiffin – a man who was fired on the airport tarmac at USC and stiffed out of his contract buyout when he was fired by the Oakland Raiders – is going to trust LSU with a “guaranteed” deal? He’d sooner trust Ed Orgeron to proofread his contract.
LSU’s lawyers are currently trying to redefine “termination” like it’s a philosophy class. Meanwhile, the Gators can sit back, sip their sweet tea and watch this Baton Rouge buffoonery unfold. Every headline about LSU’s contract shenanigans makes Florida look like the saner, safer destination for Kiffin – which is saying something, given Florida just paid Billy Napier $21 million to disappear.
But at least Florida paid Napier what he was owed.
If you’re Lane Kiffin, the choice now looks easy: Florida’s chaos is garden-variety SEC chaos. LSU’s chaos comes with subtitles and a parental advisory.
By trying to stiff Kelly, LSU doesn’t just lose credibility – it loses the trust of every top-tier coach out there.
Seriously, what coach in his right mind is signing a $100 million deal with a school that treats “guaranteed” money like it was written on a Waffle House napkin at 2 a.m.
So go ahead, LSU. Keep inventing new definitions of “for cause.” Keep pretending you didn’t actually fire Brian Kelly. Keep proving to the rest of the football world that your contracts are written in disappearing ink.
LSU’s buffoonery is embarrassing for them – but it’s beautiful for the Gators.
Turns out, the best recruiting pitch Florida could ask for is LSU’s incompetence. …
Orlando Pride using underdog status as fuel for run at repeat title
Short stuff: Speaking of Kiffin, reporters asked Gators interim coach Billy Gonzales about Kiffin perhaps being the next UF coach on the week the Gators are playing Ole Miss is the college football version of asking your waiter what he thinks of the restaurant opening next door. … Hey, Orlando, it’s time to start showing up and showing some support for the only major league champion in our city’s history. The Pride are two wins away from a second consecutive NWSL championship, and they need a crowd on Sunday against Gotham FC that is louder than the screams on Space Mountain. Show up Sunday and paint the stadium purple for 90 minutes of unstoppable Pride! … Philosophical question: If there is a government shutdown and nobody really notices, does the government really exist? …
Gators, coach Billy Gonzales reticent about Lane Train ahead of Saturday’s showdown
I’m not saying the NBA’s new All-Star Game format is stupid, but even the Pro Bowl is sending its thoughts and prayers! Best line of the week about the NBA’s convoluted, confusing All-Star Game format came from Orlando sports radio guru Marc Daniels: “I’d rather watch Chauncey Billups hosting a poker game.” .… When UCF plays Texas Tech’s $30 million roster on Saturday, it’s not David vs. Goliath – it’s Venmo vs. a venture-capital firm. … The Dallas Mavericks finally fired unpopular GM Nico Harrison, the man who inexplicably traded Luka Doncic. Harrison didn’t just make a bad trade; he made the kind of trade that gets its own 30-for-30 episode entitled “What Was He Thinking?” … Embattled Florida State coach Mike Norvell earlier this week: “I’ve actually won a championship, and we’re going to do it again. We’re going to do it here. That might piss people off. So be it. They’ll be celebrating when we’re hoisting a trophy.” Hey, he didn’t specify which trophy – maybe the Gasparilla Bowl? …
Halfway through his inaugural season, Jaguars two-way player and star rookie Travis Hunter suffers a non-contact, not-that-serious season-ending injury during practice and suddenly the pundits are saying he might be a bust and has no chance of playing both ways in the NFL. Sadly, this is the world we live in. It took Hunter an entire lifetime to build himself into a Heisman Trophy winner and generational talent and only one split-second freak injury for the hot-take crowd to write the obituary on his ability to play both ways. … Mikey likes: Texas Tech over UCF by 34 points and $20 million in NIL money, Ole Miss over Florida by 42 and a $150 million contract offer for Kiffin, FSU over Virginia Tech by 14, Miami over N.C. State by 21, Jags over Chargers by 3, Dolphins over Commanders by 1, Bills over Bucs by 6, Chauncey Billups over everybody by a royal flush!
Former Magic coach, radio analyst Richie Adubato dies at 87
Last word: A moment of silence, please. The Orlando Magic’s charismatic former coach and radio analyst, Richie Adubato, has gone to That Big Chalk Talk and Broadcast Booth in the Sky – where the stories are always colorful and the joy and laughter never fade.
More at NCAAF College Football News, Photos, Stats, Scores, Schedule & Videos